This is a story of my adventure to get kd and cook it. Enjoy.
so, i got my ipod, my car keys, and my phone, which was charging. Headed out to my car, started it up. put on my ipod, chose an awesome song. and got on my way to shoppers drug mart on davie, which Is the only place i know of that sells milk at midnight.
I get to fourth avenue, and while trying to turn, some asshole in the oncoming lane stops in the intersection as if he's going to turn, but his flashers aren't on. So I get pissed off and do a burnout and do my left turn onto 4th and start speeding. I then realize how silly speeding is, since it might jeopardize my kd mission. So i slow down, and it was good timing because i end up at a red light beside an undercover cop. I slowly make my way to burrard street. I then get on burrard and cross the bridge. some asshole in a bmw driving about 40 kmh faster then me flies past me and cuts me off and gets in the furthest lane and passes some other people... I bet he was drunk. whatevs. So i get to Burrard and davie and wait at the lights. these two couples cross the street, both highly intoxicated. right infront of my car one of the couples start drunkenly making out. The light changes and i ruin their romantic moment by reving my engine. They stop kissing and laugh, they stumble off the street and i turn onto davie and end up at my destination. When I'm at my destination, I quickly went for the milk, then the kd, then I seen some cookies on sale and got those. I then adventured over to the ice cream, but it was too rich for my blood. Then the shoppers drug mart chips were on sale so i bought two of those.
I used to go to this shoppers a lot when i used to live downtown. And when i went to the till the cashier knew me from an interesting conversation we had a long ass time ago about the movie Fight Club. We make idle chit chat and notices my absurb amount of kd(3 boxes, all of which were the high class pricey type) and I make a comment that I'm in no mood to cook my planned meal at such an hour, and kd seems like the best option. She laughs, I should have gotten her number, she's rather cute, and I think she likes me, she remembered our conversation from a year and a half ago, that definitely means something.
But anyways. While heading out. I hear a shitload of sirens. I decide not to wait to drive on davie, so I go through the back alleys to get to burrard. While crossing thurlow i looked down to see 2 ambulances and a couple cop cars outside of oasis nightclub, i assumed somebody got fucked up, and i was right.. since a buddy of mine told me when I got home that somebody OD'd at the club. So I drove back home, it was extremely quiet, except for this obnoxious bmxer who thought he could bike across the road while the only car on the road is close to him...But after that It was clear sailing.I got home, and I was exmtrely excited to make my Kraft dinner happen. I started making my kraft dinner, heating up the water, sprinkling in some salt. I dumped the kd in the water. Then I went to the bathroom, while going to the bathroom, my roomate asked where i went last week. I explained my alberta situation to him, and he understood the situation and felt for me about the bullshit bus ride thing.
I get to the washroom, get rid of unneeded nutrients, then while washing my hands, the soap flies away from me and falls in the toilet, which was pretty spectacular... I took it out and washed it out, luckily the toilet water had changed. So, I wash my hands and go downstairs to the kitchen and start working on my meal, i gather the milk and butter and a strainer and a bowl.. The kd is cooking, so I wait beside it and whistle the Song of Time from Legend Of Zelda. Then out of nowhere, 3 of my roomates start raiding the kitchen and cooking things. I get a bit flustered, so i try and act calm and cool.. I don't like cooking around people, i always feel like they will criticize my cooking strategies. anyways, the kd starts to boil, and i take some out to test it and it's the perfect texture. so i strain it, and mix it all together. 1/3 milk, and half a spoonful of butter and the kd mix.
I stir it until the powder is gone and all of the macaroni is golden. I then put it into my other bowl, i clean both of my dishes, because I'm respectable when it comes to dishes being done.
I then put some black pepper in one of those awesome pepper churning thingers(citation needed) on my KD. i mix the kd up, then put on some more.. i want every macaroni piece to have some pepper on it. I finally accomplish my goal, and finally get to eating my masterpiece.
The first bite was breath taking. It's as if I was eating at a fine dining resteraunt reserved for gods and jewish people. The second bite was even better. This one was a little bit more peppery, but oh man... It was perfect. Halfway through the meal I took in too much and started choking.. So I took a break from my kd to relax, and rest from the nonstop orgasmic meal. I then coughed, and out comes the macaroni that made me choke... I then finished my bowl, and stood their exhausted, and praised my meal to my roomates. I offered the last peice of macaroni to my roomate. but he was clearly not worthy, since he chose to make some stupid chicken burrito from scratch..
I then washed my dish, got some milk in my classic "Love brings rainbows cup" and got me some cookies, settled down, and started telling my epic tale.
It was the best macaroni i've ever had
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Sunday, March 20, 2011
Gecko Effect
This is a story inspired by a drug trip I experienced today. I've been sort of anti drugs my entire life, but there is something different about hallucinogenics. I did DMT, and this is entirely inspired by my night of experience.
Lets start on our main character, Brock, He's a teenager with a small amount of friends, good good type friends, rich kids living in the suburbs. He's different, he bikes to school, is on a vegetarian diet, and he's an alright artist. But he's sheltered by his high class living mother and father and his goody too shoes younger sister. He's not very good in academic classes, but he could care less. One day his best friend, a fellow artist and hardcore hippy named Conny(girl) who kind of has a thing for Brock, invites him to a party. At this party, he enters a room where they are all having a DMT dream party. Brock hears what it's all about and is immediately attracted to the idea. He's the last one to do it, and he has the craziest, hardcorest trip ever. It lasts half an hour, up until the cops break up the party and he's brought out of the party in a stretcher, he's still in a trance.
The next day he wakes up in a hospital, and the world looks differently, it;s altered in every way. He's living in a permanent dream space, except he can walk and move, but illusions appear to him and he cannot stop them. His parents ground him to his room, where he spends a week alone trying to recover, at first he hates the illusions, despite the fact that they are all gorgeous. But then they inspire him, and he starts making art, amazing art, gorgeous art. He then finally goes back to school. When he shows his art to a teacher,his artist makes him host an art show. His buddy Connor was worried about his absence and they have a deep conversation about the drug, Conny and Brock Do it again, just the two of them, This heightens Brock's normal being by ten, everything is hardcore different now. He can barely handle it.
His family gets him a therapist and a personal physician. both of them tell the parents that the kid might be a schitzo and he will need major psychological treatment. The family talks to him deeply and say he's going to a mental hospital. That night, Brock manages to escape the house and meet his buddy Conny and together they head off into night... The next day Brock's art show happens and it's a major hit. Then, Conny and Brock have a heart to heart followed by a kiss and map out a plan to escape together with the money Brock made from his artshow. But Brocks family send a cop out for him and arrests him and sends him home. Brock then goes to the mental hospital and they do terrible things to him and end up curing him, yet make him mentally disabled. After an angered meeting with his parents, then telling Conny that he can't live this way, not without the experience and he realizes he can't escape the facility now that he's lost part of his brain. Brock does the drug one last time, then does a memorial with his blood after he slits his wrists. He then has one final trip, the DMT explodes when he dies, the most epicest light show one can think of. The memorial becomes one of the best paintings ever done...
Ionno, made it up as I went along. But the basic premise would be the same, a preppy kid who has never affiliated with drugs before, takes DMT and gets a permanent high from it.
I'd definetly dedicate some time to this film if people found it interesting. I'd use a lot of crazy ass visual styles and a lot of electronic music. The reason why it's called Gecko Effect is because one of my friends said he seen a bunch of Geckos. I seen a bunch of Rabbits layed on top of each other that turned into butterflies, definetly going to be in the script.
Lets start on our main character, Brock, He's a teenager with a small amount of friends, good good type friends, rich kids living in the suburbs. He's different, he bikes to school, is on a vegetarian diet, and he's an alright artist. But he's sheltered by his high class living mother and father and his goody too shoes younger sister. He's not very good in academic classes, but he could care less. One day his best friend, a fellow artist and hardcore hippy named Conny(girl) who kind of has a thing for Brock, invites him to a party. At this party, he enters a room where they are all having a DMT dream party. Brock hears what it's all about and is immediately attracted to the idea. He's the last one to do it, and he has the craziest, hardcorest trip ever. It lasts half an hour, up until the cops break up the party and he's brought out of the party in a stretcher, he's still in a trance.
The next day he wakes up in a hospital, and the world looks differently, it;s altered in every way. He's living in a permanent dream space, except he can walk and move, but illusions appear to him and he cannot stop them. His parents ground him to his room, where he spends a week alone trying to recover, at first he hates the illusions, despite the fact that they are all gorgeous. But then they inspire him, and he starts making art, amazing art, gorgeous art. He then finally goes back to school. When he shows his art to a teacher,his artist makes him host an art show. His buddy Connor was worried about his absence and they have a deep conversation about the drug, Conny and Brock Do it again, just the two of them, This heightens Brock's normal being by ten, everything is hardcore different now. He can barely handle it.
His family gets him a therapist and a personal physician. both of them tell the parents that the kid might be a schitzo and he will need major psychological treatment. The family talks to him deeply and say he's going to a mental hospital. That night, Brock manages to escape the house and meet his buddy Conny and together they head off into night... The next day Brock's art show happens and it's a major hit. Then, Conny and Brock have a heart to heart followed by a kiss and map out a plan to escape together with the money Brock made from his artshow. But Brocks family send a cop out for him and arrests him and sends him home. Brock then goes to the mental hospital and they do terrible things to him and end up curing him, yet make him mentally disabled. After an angered meeting with his parents, then telling Conny that he can't live this way, not without the experience and he realizes he can't escape the facility now that he's lost part of his brain. Brock does the drug one last time, then does a memorial with his blood after he slits his wrists. He then has one final trip, the DMT explodes when he dies, the most epicest light show one can think of. The memorial becomes one of the best paintings ever done...
Ionno, made it up as I went along. But the basic premise would be the same, a preppy kid who has never affiliated with drugs before, takes DMT and gets a permanent high from it.
I'd definetly dedicate some time to this film if people found it interesting. I'd use a lot of crazy ass visual styles and a lot of electronic music. The reason why it's called Gecko Effect is because one of my friends said he seen a bunch of Geckos. I seen a bunch of Rabbits layed on top of each other that turned into butterflies, definetly going to be in the script.
Sunday, March 13, 2011
A Sagovan Tale
Another retelling of an old story i wrote awhile back. I'd love to someday write and direct this on some gorgeous island in Fiji with a bunch of sea turtles. Excuse the format, this is copy and pasted from a conversation with a friend on facebook.
Well it takes place in a mythological world, On a secluded island in the south pacific. maybe 5 miles around. Takes place long long ago, possibly during the egyptian periods. There is this tribe that lives on the island, about 50-60 people. Everyone has a specific job that they must do, and they must train their kids to do that job aswell. The island's main food source is turtles, green sea turtles to be exact. They come onto the island to nest then they depart for the sea. The weird thing about this tribe. Is that they never touch the sea, they fear it. They believe it brings harm and badluck and death. They send their dead off into the sea.
Well it takes place in a mythological world, On a secluded island in the south pacific. maybe 5 miles around. Takes place long long ago, possibly during the egyptian periods. There is this tribe that lives on the island, about 50-60 people. Everyone has a specific job that they must do, and they must train their kids to do that job aswell. The island's main food source is turtles, green sea turtles to be exact. They come onto the island to nest then they depart for the sea. The weird thing about this tribe. Is that they never touch the sea, they fear it. They believe it brings harm and badluck and death. They send their dead off into the sea.
Here is where we meet our main character. He is the son of a turtle hunter, which means he must become a turtle hunter. but he can't kill a turtle, he finds them too adorable. His father is continiously dissapointed in him, along with the rest of the tribe. So one day our main character named Sayun, decides he's going to do some turtle hunting on his own, because he believes that maybe he can;t kill a turtle because there's so much pressure on him. But on this particular day, he follows a turtle until he reaches the sea, knowing the dangers of the sea and the rules of his tribe, he's hesitant to follow. But on that day, he sees a silhouette of something far off in the sunset. Curious, he goes into the ocean and walks towards the island, but he gets to the point where he can't walk anymore and he struggles to keep himself up. So he goes back to shore... But he thinks that maybe he can reach the island if he tries.
And here is where the bulk of the story comes in, ill brief it though. Sayun practices swimming and catches on, but he cant see the island any longer. meanwhile, a young girl in the tribe gets curious about his doings, but Sayun hides himself well because no one expects him to be out at sea. His father continues to grow concerned about Sayun's lack of hunting skills aswell, and his absents and his new interest in the ocean. But after awhile the girl catches him in the act and brings it up at a tribe meeting and Sayun gets in trouble and gets punished. Frustrated with the girl and the tribe, he swears to leave the island. but he can't see the other island anymore, so he believes he might have just been seeing things. So he gives up and accepts the society, until the turtles start to stop going to the island and a famine sets in. people start dieing, and Sayun feels incredibly responsible for this because he wasn't a very good hunter, so one day, he goes to the beach, and sees the island again! He rushes back to the tribe and informs them of it, and they also see it!
They trust that he can make it to the island, so they accept that he should go and see what's over there before it dissapears. So he heads over there, but a giant storm approaches and Sayun gets caught in itHe struggles and eventually makes it within meters of the other island, but the storm takes his life. It ends with the tribe perishing, and the final shot will be of James Cook entering the island a thousand years later and finding a strange structure that Sayun made of the turtles and the sea... Sayun explored the world for his tribe and they never knew it...
That's that.
That's that.
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Moving to Vancouver
copy and pasted out of a conversation with a good friend of mine. This is my moving to vancouver tale, 5 months belated.
So i worked a summer back in alberta doing road construction. Dreadful stuff. But it got me enough money to pay off a lot of bills, get a car, a nice camera, and enough money to move back out here. So near the end of october is when i decided to go, And i was gonna get laid off because it was seasonal work, and then i could get ei and live for free! My foreman told me i could get off on the 15th of october.. But then I got sent to an asphalt crew, and I had to work until mid november. FUCK THAT SHIT. Luckily my old foreman vouched for me and I got off on the 16th.
First, I went to a road trip to saskatoon to visit my dad and hang out.I chilled there for a bit, it was fun. Went and seen Coheed and Cambria live. Which was a really awesome show. Went with a really good old friend too. But I had like 4 beers, and had to drive 2 and a half hours after the show to Regina to stay with my buddy for a few days. I was extremely sleepy, and I ended up swerving around on the road.. I ended up getting pulled over by the cops,but I explained my situation and they let me off with a warning. I stayed in Regina for 3 days, seen this Kim girl who was my text buddy for like 3 years.. she was my advice giver for a long time. but this was our first meeting since she was like 12, it was kinda hilarious. but it was a good time. I left regina to edmonton pretty late, and decided to drive all the way there in one show, and it was snowing hardcore, the first snow, My car has like shitty all season tires. So it was super sketch.
Inbetween battleford and lethbridge it was the worst. I was passing a semi at one point and i got in the other lane and starting swerving back and forth. i slid onto the shoulder and did a pretty impressive manuever to get back in formation. The rest of the drive to edmonton was pristine and gorgeous.
The next day me and my buddy Greg headed off to Vancouver.Now Greg, he's a hilarious guy to hang out with. He's down with anything. But after a long ass car ride with him, I sort of hate him... He's kinda arrogant, spoiled, always fuckin sick, and he can be a terrible person. He told me that if he got his girlfriend knocked up he was going to run to Vancouver and live with me. To which I responded "There is nothing lower in this society then that. " That was followed by an hour of uncomfortable silence. But we had fun times, we mooned truckers. Drove at like 170km outside of calgary. He was taking pictures of the mountains while driving, which scared the hell out of me. I warned him that everything i own is with me in this car, and he smartened up. We stopped in lake louise, it was pristine and gorgeous. Then stopped in sicamouse for gas and the punk ass kid took my id while i was there. We ended up in penticton to stay at gregs friends house when i realized, So we had to backtrack 3 hours to get it. Then we drove through kamloops, realized it was a lame ass city. And Kelowna is far more awwesome.
Then we arrived here And stayed at my friend dannys place. We extremely over stayed our welcome though. It was a small place and I was looking for a place to live, and settled on my cureent address. But for the last 2 days of october I had to stay in a Hostel. Which was actually a really fun experience, went to a canucks game. Chilled with australians. Drank 4 nights in a row then was too exhausted to party on halloween. Instead watched all the drunken action from my hostel window. Then I moved into this house... Hung out, was a lazy basterd. Got my car towed on the third day, 90$ to get it out.That's my moving back to vancouver story. Like it?
So i worked a summer back in alberta doing road construction. Dreadful stuff. But it got me enough money to pay off a lot of bills, get a car, a nice camera, and enough money to move back out here. So near the end of october is when i decided to go, And i was gonna get laid off because it was seasonal work, and then i could get ei and live for free! My foreman told me i could get off on the 15th of october.. But then I got sent to an asphalt crew, and I had to work until mid november. FUCK THAT SHIT. Luckily my old foreman vouched for me and I got off on the 16th.
First, I went to a road trip to saskatoon to visit my dad and hang out.I chilled there for a bit, it was fun. Went and seen Coheed and Cambria live. Which was a really awesome show. Went with a really good old friend too. But I had like 4 beers, and had to drive 2 and a half hours after the show to Regina to stay with my buddy for a few days. I was extremely sleepy, and I ended up swerving around on the road.. I ended up getting pulled over by the cops,but I explained my situation and they let me off with a warning. I stayed in Regina for 3 days, seen this Kim girl who was my text buddy for like 3 years.. she was my advice giver for a long time. but this was our first meeting since she was like 12, it was kinda hilarious. but it was a good time. I left regina to edmonton pretty late, and decided to drive all the way there in one show, and it was snowing hardcore, the first snow, My car has like shitty all season tires. So it was super sketch.
Inbetween battleford and lethbridge it was the worst. I was passing a semi at one point and i got in the other lane and starting swerving back and forth. i slid onto the shoulder and did a pretty impressive manuever to get back in formation. The rest of the drive to edmonton was pristine and gorgeous.
The next day me and my buddy Greg headed off to Vancouver.Now Greg, he's a hilarious guy to hang out with. He's down with anything. But after a long ass car ride with him, I sort of hate him... He's kinda arrogant, spoiled, always fuckin sick, and he can be a terrible person. He told me that if he got his girlfriend knocked up he was going to run to Vancouver and live with me. To which I responded "There is nothing lower in this society then that. " That was followed by an hour of uncomfortable silence. But we had fun times, we mooned truckers. Drove at like 170km outside of calgary. He was taking pictures of the mountains while driving, which scared the hell out of me. I warned him that everything i own is with me in this car, and he smartened up. We stopped in lake louise, it was pristine and gorgeous. Then stopped in sicamouse for gas and the punk ass kid took my id while i was there. We ended up in penticton to stay at gregs friends house when i realized, So we had to backtrack 3 hours to get it. Then we drove through kamloops, realized it was a lame ass city. And Kelowna is far more awwesome.
Then we arrived here And stayed at my friend dannys place. We extremely over stayed our welcome though. It was a small place and I was looking for a place to live, and settled on my cureent address. But for the last 2 days of october I had to stay in a Hostel. Which was actually a really fun experience, went to a canucks game. Chilled with australians. Drank 4 nights in a row then was too exhausted to party on halloween. Instead watched all the drunken action from my hostel window. Then I moved into this house... Hung out, was a lazy basterd. Got my car towed on the third day, 90$ to get it out.That's my moving back to vancouver story. Like it?
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